Friday, 18 April 2014

British Drinking!

I don't know whether it is the British mentality or if it is just considered socially acceptable. But when is it OK to consider a night out binging which risks your health in such a severe way, normal?? I have noticed it is not just young people but people from various ages, slamming down a pint, inviting people on drunken nights out and slurping down tequila as fast as possible. I endlessly hear people say "I need a good night out" or "last night must have been good because I can't remember a thing". Is that not frightening? We place so much importance on this poison (which is what it is). And quickly forget the horrendous effects of this it has on us. It causes liver failure, weight gain, sluggishness, tiredness, dehydration, blood or alcohol poisoning and the list goes on.  I have had countlessly invited people over for a dinner or chats, film night etc, but I feel I have probably become more separated from people because I choose to be sensible. Sensible does not mean boring either. Is it not more boring to rely on an exterior substance to make things fun?
Don't get me wrong I have done my fair share of this, however I feel I have recognised quite early on how detrimental this was to my behaviour, how vulnerable I was and the effects it had on both my physical and mental well-being. Since consciously choosing to drink less everything has improved. I am able to take on more exercise, eat healthier, and I have done so much in one year than some people do in five. I study, meet new people and get to enjoy life without having that heavy, sluggish feeling after.

I am no expert in other cultures. What I can say is visiting various countries in my life I have actively made a note on others behaviours when out. Going to Italy, I have noticed that their attitude on drinking is totally different. They seem to know how to manage their alcohol a lot more and have it in proportion. Lets take a look at how the Italians, are, open, jolly and will often vent their emotions quite easily. The British, I find, are a lot more reserved and still have the 'stiff upper lip' attitude. Just a theory but perhaps alcohol is that door to open up. A way to release certain unwanted thought and feelings. Countless times I have had drunken texts or conversations where I have thought "why didn't you tell me that before?". Are we so unable to have these conversations with a sober mind? I can tell you I am nowhere near perfect and sometimes actively telling people what you think can be challenging as I always feel I could hurt feelings. What I do try and do is reflect on thoughts and emotions and make sense of them, I exercise out frustration and I use my energies in a more suitable way, rather than spending more than I can afford getting absolutely plastered.

I apologise if this seems very opinionated however I have had numerous conversations where people say I'm 'mad' for exercising so much and basically disciplining myself, asking me how I can afford a gym membership. Well I use around one nights worth of drinking money and use it on a whole month of going to exercise classes and ensure I spend out on healthier food.

Saturday, 7 May 2011


A very stereotypical yet fascinating topic is love. Every persperctive is different, this may be because each person is unique with varying experiences, not one being is identical to another, yet there are over six billion of us. However each outtake is as important as anyone else's as we all learn through it, and it teaches us very important lessons. I would like to think my opinions are wise, no matter how irrational my behaviour may be when experiencing such traumatic yet equally beautiful times.

I have had my heartbroken three times with one person! Honestly, they have been the most horrific experiences one could have. Thinking back on it now I see how unhealthy the relationship was in many ways. Seemingly beautiful and flawless from the outside, even in my perspective I could see no faults, there was something etched inside of me that I could not translate, could not put my finger on and simply did not like. As much as we loved and adored one another, there was always this uncomfortable feeling that he was going to flee, even dreams I had prior to any negative signals he gave off, I had terrifying dreams of him leaving in a ruthless way. Over 3 years down the line, this dream, unfortunately, came true. Now I cannot deny I loved him, as I was extremely besotted, but my question is, was it healthy? The answer is simply NO!

My perspective of love altered when I started to see another individual in a different light. Through years of knowing that person, and having their solid support through difficult times, I have come to recognise a different, but just as strong, kind of love. Trust is the most important issue within a relationship, whether it be friendship, partnership etc. Earlier I mentioned always having something in the back of my mind, well this time with this person, even if we parted, I know deep down that we will never be away from one another. I trust that persons feelings, it's almost as though I can sence the genuine nature and feelings being displayed towards me. Even though strong words have never been ushered, there has never been a need, whereas with my past relationships I wanted constant reassurance to make me feel safe. I guess actions are always louder than words. Infact, if anything, we both deny any such feelings exist between us. It is just the fact that he is alive that makes me feel at ease, I don't need to be physically near him or even speak to that person every day, I almost know he will always be with me.
I am a massive believer in fate, others think similar but may describe it in a different way, but I feel that whatever happens, will happen for a reason. This is the thing, I trust that my fate lies with him, whether it be just pure friendship or perhaps something more, it doesn't matter as long as he is in my life, I don't care. Initially I felt I can't be his best friend without anything else, but i found it is more impossible to not have him in my life! We bond in ways I have never bonded with other people. He naturally knows how to cheer me up without trying and effortlessly knows how to behave around me. Although we are not together, this is more than I have ever shared with other partners I have been with for years at a time.

Anyway, my point is that there are numerous types of love, some healthy some not. But true love is something that may not be defined in a solid relationship. You may not see these people walking hand in hand, they may go their own way but they always manage to come back. The best part is the comfort in knowing that that person will stay in your life; till death do us part!